Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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