Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
