I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
