you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
