So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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