Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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