whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
