Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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