I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
