I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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