it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
