i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
