just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
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