Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
