So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
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