YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Randomize
