Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
