Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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