After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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