With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
