did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
