i don't like sucking hair
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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