This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Randomize
