Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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