I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
