She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
