You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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