She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder meâ€
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