walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
