Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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