foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
