i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
