The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
