i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
