nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
