So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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