lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
