so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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