Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Fuck appropriateness.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
