Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
