Just mADE A PArabola og urine
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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