I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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