Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
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