Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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