Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
