there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
