Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
you didnt know i had herpes?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
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