I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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