No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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