all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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